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Scriptorium

Herojuice

It seems that a lot of my favourite writers have now started posting recipes. In that spirit, you lucky Drekkers will now get the recipe for herojuice.

[nb. There are many herojuices. This is mine. You will probably have your own.]

1. Take one prime banana in the fullness of its life. Chop that sucker up and put it in a blitzer.

2. Add in half a tub of plain organic yoghurt.

3. Sprinkle one generous handful of mixed berries, picked yourself, in the first hour of the day. Or you can use frozen mixed berries. whatever, it’s your body.

4. Blitz until substance turns gloopy. Depending on contents you will now either have Pink Herojuice or Blue Herojuice.

5. ADD SPECIAL HERO INGREDIENTS. 1 Teaspoon of Organic Kelp powder (because all our thyroid glands have a half-life of about 50,000yrs these days). 1 Teaspoon of Organic Spirulina (because you want it to be herojuice, right, not healthjuice). 1 Teaspoon of Organic Turmeric (because, like Mumm-Ra, it will make you live forever).

6. Blitz. You will now have made Yellow Herojuice, or quite possibly Beige Herojuice. Taste. It will taste like drinking curry-flavored grass clippings. Go back and add another generous handful of them berries.

7. Blitz once again.

Congratulations! You now have a superdrink that will mean you are probably invincible. Add a generous dollop of local wildflower honey if that’s your jam, and quaff like a god.

[nb. to make Batjuice, you can add one scoop of your preferred protein powder. You will now be Batman, but smelling more summery]

Hermit Country

I was planning to write a (probably) very long ramble on the culture war, but you, Delicious Reader, have been saved from that fate by the words of Dr. Ellis, writing on Morning, Computer [I always want to put an ‘!’ at the end of that, because it reads in my head retrofuture-y, the family Robinson waking up cheery and radium-filled before they realize that they live at the tyranny of machine intelligence. Which is not a reflection on the content, obvs. Anyway…]

Try this, for a minute. Try to describe your experience of how your brain works. Think of a metaphor that works for you. Then describe your experience of the thing that stops it working. Explain your brain to yourself. It’s a good way to surface the problems, and perhaps the ways to solve them. The inside of your own head is really pretty amazing in ways that are unique to you. Even the annoying or “bad” parts. Sit and breathe and watch it go, and then paint a picture of it with words. That’s all we do, here in hermit country. Paint with words. Sit down next to me.

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Last of March: Reading, Robinson, and Coupland

Just a couple of revolutions before it’s officially the end of March, and I’m holding on before I announce my March Bookhaul (a very small effort this month, tbh, but I’m hoping that by some miracle a couple more ordered books get here on Saturday). This month I think I’ll call it my ‘Haul of Literary Shame’ as I focussed on getting books that I really should have read by now.

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